With Friends Like These…
by Pixieblade
Summary: A modern Tokyo AU. How will the boys deal with fates that constantly seem destined to try and break them? Will they be able to hold onto what happiness they have found, or will they break completely under the pressure?
1. With friends like these

**With Friends Like These…**

**Saiyuki AU**

**85/39**

**T+**

It wasn't like this was a new situation or anything. Really he shouldn't have been surprised in the least to come down stairs and find the kettle whistling on the stovetop. They'd been doing this since they were kids after all….

It was unusual to have two new kids in the same day that weren't related. He'd been in the kitchen with Goku when the Sisters had brought them in: one with bright red hair and wide eyes and the other a dark shadow behind him-his green eyes dead to the world around him. Goku had immediately bounded over to the former and asked if his hair was hot. He'd groaned from behind his Akira manga and tossed an apple at the idiot for his stupidity. He'd refused to believe he was jealous over the two's easy friendship.

When they'd gone to sit down the dark haired boy hadn't moved, he just kept staring at his worn tennis shoes. The new boy turned and frowned before reaching out and twining their fingers together with one hand. He smiled toothily when a sharply pointed chin rose and deep forest green eyes finally fixed on him.

"I'm Gojyo," he said, thrusting a thumb at his chest.

"Gonou." Green eyes whispered softly, eyes never blinking as he stared at Gojyo for a long hard moment before he finally smiled. It was breathtaking and pure and made the three of them stop short as they stared at his transformed features. Gojyo smirked and drew him close enough to drape a scrawny arm over his thin shoulders.

Gonou never stopped watching him.

Six years later the two were still inseparable. If there was a problem, one would usually find Gojyo at the center of it with Gonou calmly telling the hot head to cool down. If it was Gojyo's fault (his private opinion being that it always was somehow) Gonou would sternly tell the young man off while making it seem like a compliment: 'You're too smart to not realize those would explode if you put them in the microwave. Why did you do it to all four?' was his personal favorite.

If it wasn't his friend's fault, he would often be found with a bloody lip from defending the boy with a savagery that bordered on psychotic. The four of them had ended up rooming together early on mainly because the other kids were terrified of Gonou's wicked temper and Gojyo's sharp tongue in defending his friend. Yet of the two Gojyo was the more friendly and flexible.

Within a few days of their coming to the orphanage Gojyo had the Sisters wrapped around his fingers and was playing soccer and dodge ball with the others in the yard while Gonou watched on from the tree line. He'd hold a book and sometimes he even remembered to turn the pages absently, but mostly he stared darkly at the field and didn't blink. He took to sitting with him not because he wanted to, but because Goku had decided he liked him, and therefore he was obliged to hang out with the two.

He'd learned early on Gonou was smart. Smart enough that he'd brushed off all Goku's insistent questions to the other with intense relish. Because of that, the four had become…if not friends, then cohorts of a sort and while he'd never had any inclination to be friends with anyone beside Goku (and even that wasn't by choice), and Goku and Gojyo were friends with almost everyone, Gonou had never grown past the three of them out of sheer possessiveness. Of course that possession was mainly focused on Gojyo with sporadic bursts that included himself and Goku. Really, he'd have a complex about it all if he gave a damn.

Which he didn't.

But like all things it had to end sometime. One night an older boy came with a blond woman in a beat up old Toyota for Gojyo. He spoke quietly with the Sisters as it poured outside. An hour later the three of them were watching from the front door as the car drove away-Gojyo sitting in the back seat, hands pressed against the back window as he stared back at them, a resigned, slightly fearful look on his face. Goku barely caught Gonou before he ran out into the storm after him. He didn't appear out of their room for a week afterwards.

It was on a Sunday before Mass that he finally dragged him bodily from the dark room by his shirt collar. He was despondent and sullen as usual, although no one else would have noticed, but _he_ did. Predictably, his friend was heartbroken. At sixteen Gonou was taller than him, all lithe muscle and piercing angry eyes behind those thin wire glasses. He turned on one of his more powerful glares, which did nothing to him after all these years and opened his mouth to complain when he was knocked a good three feet by someone.

Blinking up into grassy green eyes he brushed a long mousy braid out of his face with his hand, pausing halfway with a look of shock and familiarity. He opened his mouth, closed it, repeated the fishlike impression and then finally choked out a word.

"Kanan."

The girl blinked and did the same carp motion a few times and then smiled hugely. She jerked Gonou to her and hugged him savagely. "Gonou! Oh, I knew it was you. When the Sister confirmed our parents' names I couldn't wait to find you. I just knew it!"

He stood there frowning down at the two until Gonou locked eyes with him, the same sort of fever bright look dancing behind glasses that he'd seen nearly six years before: possession, determination, _love_. It was like Gojyo all over again, and look how well that'd turned out?

"Genjo, this is Kanan; my twin sister."

"Didn't know you had one." He bit out, angry at what was starting to feel like betrayal. He wondered if Gojyo had known about the girl? If not, what would he say to this sudden development?

"Our parents split us up. I've been looking for you for years!" Kanan chatted away eagerly, staggering to her feet and then helping Gonou up beside her. He noticed Gonou hadn't let go of her hand. In fact if he held it any tighter he was certain his friend would break it. Not that he cared of course.

"I spoke to the Sisters; I have an apartment over in Rippongi and want you to come live with me. Mom passed away last year and who knows were Father is, but we can be a family again, isn't that great! We should get you packed, they said you didn't have much, can we do it now?"

Gonou looked about them pole axed. He wasn't happy with the suddenness of everything, but there was Gonou smiling shakily and nodding his head. They didn't even notice when he followed them back to their room and stood in the doorway while the girl jammed most of the two small drawers of clothes into a duffel, cast a disparaging glance around the room with its two bunk beds and sniffed like she'd been offended.

"Well, let's go shall we?"

"Gonou."

Confused emerald eyes blinked at him as they passed. "Genjo, I'm…"

He held out a scrap of paper. "If you need anything," He muttered, refusing to break eye contact as Gonou clasped his hands and graced him with the first smile he'd seen since Gojyo'd left.

"We'll be fine," he said softly, "but thank you."

"Goku's gonna be pissed as all hell."

"Yes, but he still has you. You were all he ever needed after all."

"Tch." He grumbled, a grimace on his face as he thought of having to explain to Goku why another of his friends was leaving without any warning.

Gonou surprised him with a rough hug. It was brief and choking and he almost let himself relax into the touch of one of the few people on this planet he trusted. Almost. But it was over before he could think of something to say and then his friend was turning and walking away from him without a second glance. He bit the inside of his mouth and refused to run after him.

There was something too _intense_ about that girl. He couldn't place it, but it was like she was a very tightly wound spring just ready to explode under the pressure. He shook his head and ran a hand through his long blond hair, toying with the ends annoyed. He didn't know what it was, but he definitely didn't like her.

Several stragglers to Mass passed him whispering and he knew it wouldn't be long before the rumors were flying through the orphanage about this latest development. Standing in the hall like an idiot wasn't going to solve anything though. Turning on his heel he went to find the bottomless pit. He couldn't figure it out, but being next to Goku was always so calming; at least when he wasn't 'starving' which was apparently what he was doing every hour of the day he wasn't sleeping or eating. He wasn't going to think about what that meant however, he had enough things to deal with after he turned eighteen this winter and had to leave the orphanage.

Like what the hell to do with Goku?

He grumbled something nasty about not being anyone's fucking keeper as he stomped off toward the kitchens. He needed an Excedrin and a coffee if he was going to get through the next few months with his sanity in check. Maybe he should start smoking?

It was around Halloween when it happened. Just like they appeared and disappeared within days of each other, Gonou and Gojyo were back at his side, sitting next to each other on the bottom bunk when he and Goku walked in from dinner.

"Yo." Said reject one, his arms stretched out behind him as he leaned back on his hands and kicked his legs absently into the air.

"Genjo, Goku, good evening." Said reject two, legs curled beneath him and hands neatly folded in his lap, although he noticed they were sitting close enough to touch from hips to knees. Interesting.

"Gojyo! Gonou!" Goku bounced over to the two excitedly, asking a million questions while Gojyo laughed heartily and ruffled the kid's messy brown hair.

"What the fuck are you two doing back here?" he snapped above the rabble.

He stood there glaring at the two while they exchanged some sort of telepathic discussion and nodded in unison. Gojyo finally cleared his throat and pulled Gonou against his chest, arm tight about his shoulders and fingers buried in longer chocolate hair.

"Shit happened and we're back. Got a problem with that, dickhead?" he asked acidly.

"Gojyo…" Gonou muttered disapprovingly, sliding his hands between them and pushing himself off the red head's broad chest.

He turned around partway in Gojyo's embrace, but didn't leave it, he noticed. "Our…_family_ arrangements have changed. We were just discussing the possibility of leaving here; maybe getting an apartment in the city together."

He sifted through the information and then jabbed a finger at each of them as he spoke. "Where's your sister? Your mom and brother?"

"Dead." They answered in unison as his eyes narrowed. Goku's went wide and scared as he shifted back to his side like he always did when things were confusing, he refused to think about the implications of that too. The kid was fucking older than him for the love of God! Even if he was a tad touched in the head.

"Please, let's not discuss this now. We're back, shouldn't we celebrate or something?" Gonou easily deflected the questions with a plastic smile and upheld hands, a placating force to be reckoned with that seemed both softer and yet sharper too.

Gojyo stared at him for a moment before hauling him to his feet. "I think it's high time for some trick-or-treating, whatcha say, runt?" he called out to Goku, his arm still flung haphazardly over Gonou's shoulders as he leaned on the smaller teen heavily. He caught the flash of something silver around Gojyo's throat and peered at it harder, forcing his eyes to come into focus on the small…_cross_? When the hell had he become so religious?

"Who you calling a runt? You perv!" Goku shouted back, jumping at the red head and thoroughly distracting him from the cross, or the implications of the two showing up again in their lives.

The night degraded from there.

A month later found him confused and disoriented. The four of them were once again sitting around a kitchen table joking and hanging out. The mood was considerably lighter than when they were kids though and for that small miracle he was suffering through the two idiots food fight.

"Why the hell are you two here again?" he muttered darkly, chopsticks furiously mixing a packet of mayonnaise into his ramen despite the gagging noises Goku and Gojyo were making as he slurped the noodles nosily.

"You saw the lease, we're neighbors!" Gojyo beamed, chuckling as a spent mayo packet whirled past his head. He grinned and grabbed a hold of Gonou as his friend passed him and used him as a human shield. "Save me, Gonou! Cherry-chan's on the warpath!"

"Tch. Idiot."

He smirked as Gonou patted him on the head and very gently said in the sweetest voice possible, "Please play nicely children, or I'll have to find the ruler Mother Superior gave me as a going away gift."

Gojyo gaped as Gonou detangled himself and sauntered off. The two had certainly gotten close in the last month and a half. Not for the first time did he wonder about that either. They'd been apart for six months. In all likelihood, they're lives had been utter shit from what little he had scraped together. He knew from the papers that Gojyo's mom had been locked up in a psych ward for trying to kill him and his brother with an axe; the red head was growing his hair long to cover the two scars across his cheek since he'd gotten back. No word on the brother.

Gonou's story was a bit creepier and he'd yet to get the full picture from either as they'd been pretty closed lipped about the whole situation. What he knew wasn't pretty. Gonou had a new scar himself, a large ragged one across his abdomen that looked like a knife wound. He'd walked in on them in the locker room back at the orphanage the week before they left.

Gonou had been standing in front of Gojyo between his knees. His head was bowed and his dark brown hair had hidden his eyes. His shirt was off, the button on his jeans opened, like he'd been stopped while changing. Gojyo sat on the bench clad only in a towel, his wet hair a red-black curtain that hung to his chin. He glanced up, his hair falling back away from his face and said something he couldn't hear, his finger tips brushing over the ragged edge of dark skin. Gonou shivered at the touch, his fingers balling into fists by his side as Gojyo's nails bit into his hip roughly.

"Never again, do you hear me? This is mine as much as yours." His voice was ragged as he leaned in and pressed his lips against the surface. Gonou gasped, hands coming up to fist in the ruby lengths and cling tightly to the bowed figure.

"Gojyo…" he sobbed, breaking down for the first time since he'd met the two. "I'm not…."

Something had happened while they were separated that had forced them together harder and faster and grittier than anything he'd seen in his short eighteen years and he knew in that instant no matter how close Goku and he tried to be with them, they would never let them in, not like that any way.

"I already said it didn't I? You're stuck with me. Now and forever. That's why you gave me this, right?" He touched something shiny at the hollow of his neck and he realized it must be the cross. "When you found her, that's all that was left to salvage. You gave it to me and what did you say, Gonou?"

"No."

"What did you say to me?" he insisted and he had never seemed so serious as he did in that instant.

"I said…I said I couldn't take another person leaving." He stammered brokenly, shoulders hunched over Gojyo's as tears slipped over his cheeks and speckled the pale blue tile floor.

"And I told you I wouldn't. I'm not leaving you, ever, so you can't try this again, not ever." He pressed his lips against the scar again, running his tongue from end to end as Gonou moaned and clutched at his back, his nails leaving angry red welts over his shoulders and up his neck. It didn't go any farther than that, Gojyo pressed one last kiss to his scar and held him tightly for a long time. The thought was there though, implanted in bright, flashing lights in his brain that the two were so close, so much a part of the other that if they weren't 'together' they probably would be or should be.

He'd slowly faded from the doorway, his shadow retreating as he silently slipped back to their room. Watching them had made some kind of cosmic sense and yet he still wasn't sure what exactly it was that he now understood. Goku blinked up at him from his bed, a guilty look flashing in amber eyes as he scrambled to get to the ladder and pull himself up to his own bunk. He wasn't sure why he did it, but he found himself grabbing the boy by the wrist and pulling him back down onto the narrow twin bed.

He slapped the light switch and sunk into the warm sheets beside the bemused teen, toeing off his house slippers and tossing his shirt into the hamper by the closet.

"Genjo?"

"Just stay here tonight. They won't be back for a while and I'm too tired to deal with your whining about hitting your head every morning on the fan."

"I don't…!" Goku started embarrassed.

"Goku."

Something in his voice must have betrayed him. Some minuscule feeling of nervousness or confusion because a dawning comprehension spread over the bright face as Goku slithered in between the sheets and molded himself effortlessly against him. He turned and faced the wall, determined not to let the peace that was settling into his bones at the warm touch steal his sanity.

"I'm moving out on my birthday." He remarked suddenly, a faint smile on his lips when Goku sat up straight and banged his head on the under bars of his own bed. Before the teen could respond he snaked his hand between the sheets and wrapped them firmly around Goku's wrist. "You're coming with me and I think…I think those two are too."

Goku settled back down beside him, peering at him until he rolled over and lay on his back, the sheet falling away to reveal a lightly tanned chest and soft violet eyes.

"You're too much trouble to leave on your own." He joked, lightly running the back of his fingers over Goku's cheek. "None of you even know how to cook. How the hell do you expect to live on your own?"

Goku grinned broadly, "Like you're one to talk…mayo on ramen? Do you even know how gross that is?"

"Idiot. If I can't tell it's messed up it's because you'll eat anything not nailed down." He smiled slightly, more capable of showing his true emotions when they were alone like this wrapped up in darkness then he ever could be in public, but Goku understood that about him, accepted it, embraced it, which is why tonight, in this small bed with their only friends just a few steps down the hall, he finally gave in to the meddling emotions he'd pushed back for so many years.

He embraced Goku back.

Which is why waking up in the middle of the night to find Gonou in his kitchen making tea at ungodly hours, wasn't that unusual. They'd grown closer after they'd moved out, the four of them almost inseparable, even going so far as to work in the same mall together-if not the same stores, but there'd been a change too. It had seemed to him that night he spied on them in the locker room that they'd finally accepted their feelings, but the minute they'd moved out Gojyo had done a 180 degree turn. He started hitting the clubs and more than once he'd found the man passed out dead drunk on their front stoop because Gonou had locked him out.

It wasn't that they were fighting. If Gojyo went out he normally stayed out all evening, finding companionship in the form of one tramp or another and it had been at his insistence that they'd added the chain across the door to keep prowlers out. Too bad it also kept smashed homophobic idiots out as well. At least, that's what he figured anyways. More often than not it wouldn't be ten minutes after Gojyo'd leave for the night before Gonou stepped through their door and made a bee line for the green tea and honey pot on the kitchen counter. He never spoke about it. Never had too, but that didn't stop him from coming, or the fact that the green and red tea cup with the small crack along the side had been unofficially marked as his.

This night had been different though. Standing there in the doorway he glanced at the blurry red lines of the digital clock: 3:37am. That was a bit late for him to be over. There was something else about the man, something taut and edged and jagged that teased him until he finally put a finger on the elusive thought: Gonou was wearing a coat; an off white duster that hung past his knees and was oddly colored around the hem.

He stepped forward swiftly, a hand clenching the slumped shoulder with enough force to spin him around against the counter as he cursed savagely. Gonou wouldn't meet his eyes and when he shook the man he backed up even farther, the tea kettle was sent crashing to the floor, exploding in a mock exaggeration of a good time, the splurt of scalding water jutting up to wet the hem of his pajama pants.

His face was red as the other; the sticky sweet blood pooled on the kitchen floor and coated Gonou from head to foot. There were messy droplets splattered across his white face and dirty glasses, his green eyes feverish and wild-one was so blood shot and swollen he wondered if all the blood and gore was really someone else's or if some of that thick mess was partially his. Dried pieces cracked around his neck, flaking off to flutter to the floor as he swallowed convulsively a couple of times.

He narrowed his sharp eyes to slits, nails digging into his shoulders as he hissed through clenched teeth, "What the _fuck_ happened?"

Gonou smiled a bit crazily and tilted his head to the side, finger nails picking at a spot of dried blood on his coat. He shrugged unconcerned, "They touched him," he stated simply.

He knew right then that Gonou's thin cord holding him to reality had frayed and snapped like a rusty suspension wire. Scoffing loudly he glanced briefly at the knife rack by the rice cooker, then turned a weary eye back to Gonou.

"What do you mean 'they touched him'? Lots of people have touched him, his an idiot like that. You both are." He added that last bit just for good measure.

Stormy eyes snapped to his and he felt a cold trickle of sweat down his spine. This was not the normal semi-banal Gonou they all knew and, well, feared; this was something else, some trapped demonic Godling or something. "_They_ touched _him_." he hissed savagely, a silibant edge to the words that made him flinch.

"Can he walk?" When his question was met with a stony silence he cursed.

"Does he even know what you did?"

"He's unconscious." That's why Gonou was in his kitchen and not beside Gojyo then.

"Does he know?" he persisted.

"…."

"Does h…"

"Yes." He snarled defensively.

"…Fuck." He rubbed the bridge of his nose and thought furiously. He'd known that Gonou had dealt with his sister's death harshly, the scar and the cryptic words he'd over heard that night had painted the picture of a man distraught enough to try and kill himself, but this Gonou in front of him right now had the look of someone who had gone and taken back his possession and they all knew he'd never learned to share like normal kids.

So he posed the unspoken question in his mind: _what did one do with a seventeen year old who'd killed to take back his friend?_

"Go shower."

"What?"

"Go shower, _here_, not at home. Grab what you want from my room and then go over there and pack a bag."

"Why?"

"You can't stay here."

"I'm not leaving him."

"You are."

"No." The word was almost unintelligent it was so growled out.

"I'm not having a debate here, Gonou. Go shower, pack a bag and get on the next plane to Shanghai."

He scratched down a name, address and phone number. "Go here and tell them I sent you. I was planning on telling you soon anyways, but that can wait. Go. I'll send the monkey in a few days and get _him_ looked at by this doc I know. When he's able I'll give him the option of knowing where you are. I'll come afterwards, but this is his decision to make, not yours. It's time he grew up and learned the truth.

Hanging his head in defeat Gonou groaned. "I know."

"How did you know?" he asked almost gently, walking back towards his room.

Following behind him, he barely heard Gonou's broken whisper. "They left the cross on the kitchen table."

"Then they got what they deserved, taunting you like that."

Gonou shook his head, "Yes, but not at their expenses. How many people have to get hurt because the system is broken?"

"If not them then someone else's." he returned, rooting around for a pair of long slacks and a tank and sweatshirt. Goku slept sprawled across their bed like a child, half in and half out of the sheets and a pillow balled up beneath his shaggy mane of hair.

"I don't care." Gonou whispered softly.

He gave him a sideways glance, "No, I don't suppose you do."

"Go there, they won't say anything and China won't extradite you if only to piss off the Japanese Officials."

"But I kil…"

"Do **not** say it!"

"Look, you are going to have to die here; do you understand me? Cho Gonou can't have survived. I'll make a few calls, see if I can't make it look like a rival gang ripped them to shreds and not you. I still have a few favors with the local Yankees."

"Why?"

"Because none of you can take a piss without me. I've been bailing the three of you out of shit for half our lives and I'm not about to stop now just because of a little mass homicide. They were the scum of the city anyways. Now go shower and then get the hell out of here. Tell _him_ I'll be right behind you."

"Thank you, Genjo."

"Don't thank me. Don't you ever thank me." He snapped forcing him into the shower and slamming the door closed in his face. Leaning against the heavy wooden door, the grain rough under his cheek he sighed, "Just stop being a fucking martyr about this. Please."

Gonou didn't answer, but the tap turned on nosily and the water started to flow from behind the door. Slumping to the floor he banged his head against it a few times for good measure and then pulled himself to his feet. He had a lot of calls to make and not a lot of time to do them in.

XXXXXXX

Gonou looked from the taxi to the temple and back again. "Are you sure this is the right address?" he asked in broken Cantonese.

"Right address, you go, head priest." His driver hurried to assure him and when Gonou turned back around, floored the gas and took off leaving him standing in the middle of an abandoned street. Sighing he hitched his duffle a bit higher on his shoulder and touched the little silver cross around his neck. It was still speckled in blood as a reminder of what attachments had gotten him so far. Just as he was placing his foot upon the first step the door opened and a thin man of undeterminable age with a long light golden braid and fox-like features poked his head out from a second story window.

"Cho Gonou?" he asked lightly.

"Yes?" craning his neck he peered at the man nervously.

"Genjo called, welcome to Yufo Temple."

XXXXXXX

He glanced at his watch face again. 1:15 in the morning and the old man still wasn't here. What the hell was taking him so long? He'd been on a plane for the better part of the evening due to bad weather stuck and was not in the greatest of moods. If the old coot wasn't here in the next five minutes he was seriously going to kill someone.

"Gen~jo~!"

He cringed, gripped his luggage handle painfully tight and turned towards the lilting voice. "Master," he moaned dejectedly. The man was wearing his monk's robes and practically bounced out of a rickshaw that pulled to a stop in front of the airport luggage carrier. "It's 2010 and you're riding in that?"

The older man cocked his head and looked perplexed as the driver attempted to load the three pieces of heavy luggage onto the back of the wagon like vehicle. "What's wrong with it?"

He sighed and climbed in beside him. "How is he?"

"He's better, less broken but there's still so much work to be done. Goku's been a tremendous help."

"Tch. I'll bet."

"He's got a very healthy appetite." He ran a critical eye over him, "no wonder you're so skinny."

"Hmph."

"Any word on the other one?"

He sighed and cracked his neck loudly, "I told him Cho Gonou was dead."

"That's not a very nice thing to do."

"It's their own damn fault. If he wants to start fresh I told him he should go to Changning. That he could find what he was looking for there. Maybe stop being so much of a whore."

"I'm not sure if that's the best way of handling the situation, you know?"

He shrugged. "Not my problem any more. I've done what I can for them. I've got my own life to deal with and he's a freaking bottomless pit that's going to take all my attention."

"When you're not studying for your proficiency exams of course."

"Of course. Not that I need to. I've passed all but the last tests to become your successor, Master."

"Yes, you have. Well now, shall we get going back to the temple? I think Goku might have terrified everyone by now, waiting for us."

"Idiot."

Koumyou smiled at him.

XXXXXXX

Hakkai glanced up from the book's spine and nodded at the clock. It was just after five and he was technically done for the day. He closed down his computer, restacked the books that still had to be categorized on the library cart and gathered his belongings. He checked his wallet; he still needed to buy groceries for dinner tonight. The Huayuan Residence Community wasn't far from the library, but if he passed his apartment and headed over towards the Huazheng Police station, he might be able to catch old man Yeng before he closed shop for the day.

He was digging through his pocket for his keys when he heard a familiar voice. Glancing up he didn't notice when he dropped the bag of vegetables, the Asian pears rolling around on the dirty sidewalk as tears slid unbidden down his cheeks. He cupped his hands (keys and all) over his mouth and choked out a word as he ran forward.

"Gojyo!"

Gojyo turned at the sound of something hitting the pavement. His Chinese sucked worse than his English and neither was getting through to the old woman sweeping the front step of the apartment complex. His red eyes went wide at the flash of green eyes and chocolate hair rushing towards him. It was by reflex only that he caught the man without tumbling them both to the ground.

The smell hit him first, that cool crisp sent of freshly laundered and starched cloth that meant 'home' to him. The gleam of silver caught his eye as he pushed the form away from him only to clutch him back against his chest crushingly. Long cool fingers cupped his cheek as his hair was pushed out of his eyes and a messy kiss was planted right on his lips. It didn't even faze him. This, _this_ is what that prick Genjo had said would fix everything in his life. This would stop making him waste it in one meaningless affair after another.

Fucker was right.

"Gonou! That prick said you were dead! What the hell happened, why'd you leave?"

Hakkai pulled back and shook his head sadly, "I'm sorry, Gojyo, but Gonou died the night you were taken. They call me 'Hakkai' now. Cho Hakkai. Something about the eight sins I carry for my crimes. I'm not really sure to be quite honest."

Gojyo looked the man over: the scrawny kid he'd grown up with was gone, replaced by this soft spoken, mild mannered man who wore button down burgundy shirts and a blood stained silver cross around his neck. He touched it lightly with the tip of an outstretched finger and whispered softly, burying his face against his neck.

"I thought you were dead."

"I'm sorry."

"You promised to never leave." He accused darkly.

"I never wanted to, but I couldn't stay, not after…what I'd done."

"Because of me."

"No. For you. For me, for us. I wasn't about to lose someone I loved again."

Gojyo snapped his eyes up to meet the darkly flashing green ones above his, completely oblivious to the old lady yelling at them in Chinese or the middle schoolers gaping at them from across the street. "What did you say?"

Hakkai sighed and rested his forehead against his. "I said love, Gojyo. I've been in love with you since forever."

"Why? But Kanan?"

"She wanted to be 'family'. Wanted it more than anything and I didn't know any other way. It only happened once, but when she was kidnapped by that gang, I couldn't save her. She couldn't take it, especially not after she found out she was pregnant. When she killed herself all I saw was another person leaving me. Selfish, I know, but I couldn't take it."

"I know the rest." Gojyo said softly, detangling them and righting him onto his feet. He kept their fingers twined together as they collected the torn bag and the four pears.

"If you hadn't found me that night, I probably wouldn't have made it." He whispered throat raw with emotion.

"It took a month you know. When I got out of the ICU and found out about mom I couldn't think of anywhere else I wanted to be. I called the orphanage, but they said you'd left. That was the first night I had a good lead about your new address."

"Fate, I guess." He whispered, turning the key in the lock and allowing Gojyo to step past him into the sparse apartment. Other than a few books and a futon there was nothing there. Nothing personal at all.

"Well, this will make moving my shit in a lot easier," Gojyo smiled crookedly at him from beneath a curtain if ruby hair.

"Gojyo?"

"That asshole has our luggage at the temple. A fully stocked bag a piece."

"How did you know?"

He shrugged, slouching out of his jacket as he placed the bag and food on the counter. "Didn't. He gave me this address and said there was a room he knew of for cheap. I brought your stuff because there was no way in hell I was giving even a piece of you up to those jackals from the charity hospital."

"Oh, Gojyo." He slipped in behind him, arms twining around the broad chest as he pressed himself up against him.

"I'm not giving you up again, Go…Hakkai. We made a promise damn it."

"I know. I know. I'm so sorry."

"Don't be." He turned in Hakkai's embrace and cupped his chin with gentle fingers.

"Just, just show me that you missed me. Show me until I think this has to be a dream." His voice was low and husky as he whispered the words against Hakkai's open mouth, a sigh escaping him when they were swallowed down passionately.

"I love you, Gojyo. I always have, always will, in this life and the next, forever."

"Promises, promises." He grinned, flicking his tongue over the shell of a pale ear. "Damn well better. I hate Chinese food you know."

Hakkai's throaty laugh sent sparks down his spine. He didn't think they'd be collecting their belongings anytime soon.

XXXXXXX

"About fucking time." He growled from the doorway.

"I thought priests weren't supposed to curse or smoke?" Gojyo asked lazily, an arm draped possessively around Hakkai's waist.

"I'm a monk, not a priest." He snapped, rolled sutras in his hand as he turned and with perfect aim, slapped a bouncing Goku upside the head. "Stop that you fucking monkey!"

Hakkai bit his lip while Gojyo chuckled evilly. "Didn't think you were allowed to screw either." He barked out when Goku turned the big puppy dog eyes on him.

"Oh, for the love of…why are you even here?"

"We thought we could go out together to celebrate."

"Celebrate what?" The youngest Sanzo in a decade asked wearily.

The two men grinned like fools. "We figured, even if it can't be legal and all, having a Sanzo priest marry us would work in the God's eyes."

"Oh hell no."

"Genjo…" Hakkai smiled pleasantly at him.

"For fucks' sake." He groaned, head cradled in his hands as he shook his head, "Fine."

"Thank you, Genjo."

"I told you not to thank me."

"I know."

"…."

"You're welcome."

~Fin.


	2. who needs enemies?

**...Who Needs Enemies?**  
Saiyuki AU  
39/85  
T+

If he had to sum up his life in two words it'd be this: it sucked.

It could have been worse, he groused, he could have been like that poor sap by the window. When they'd first brought him here from Family Services, and what a joke that place had been, he'd already figured out not only was the system broken, it should have been turned into scrap and left to rot in some abandoned waste dump. He was as angry as anyone else in the orphanage, just maybe more forceful in showing it to the wide-eyed, love-starved waifs that had crowded close trying to touch him. He shuddered at the thought of all those grasping, reaching hands.

Yes, that was definitely one of the worst moments of his short life. Standing by the sakura tree he watched the Sisters try and get the older kids into some semblance of a cleaning crew. Not having to participate was one of the perks of still being under the age limit for child labor laws, he guessed. All he had to do was keep his bunk tidy and he was fine. Heck, he'd practically taken care of himself the last two years, making a stupid bed was nothing.

He felt the tingling sensation on the back of his neck again and spun, amethyst eyes flashing in the summer sun as he tried to find the source of his unease. He'd been here a week and someone was already stalking him, great. He couldn't find the source though, whoever it was had to be a master at hide-and-seek, but it still felt weird knowing he was being watched. He wasn't creeped out, he knew what _that_ sensation felt like and this wasn't it. It was more like…like he was being studied abstractedly, like watching a butterfly dip in and out of the flowers. There was no malice, no lust, no friendship, just a bemused sort of feeling that he couldn't shake no matter where he went in the yard.

But it was only out here that he felt it. When he went back inside the feeling wore off. He had thought at first that meant someone on the outside was watching him, but when he looked there was no one. The orphanage was set at the end of a small neighborhood, the only building on their street, and surrounded by a large grassy field and a few withered apple trees. There was no where for someone to hide. So where was he?

It was definitely a guy though, he knew that much. Girls cooed and petted and cried and he couldn't stand their sniveling in the least. At the best they would leave him alone, at the worst they'd try and 'mother' him. Like he needed one of those after his own had tried to….

No. He wasn't going to think about that. He stared up into the pale green leaves overhead as they bobbed and fluttered in the breeze, his eyes slipping shut as the combination of warm sun and cool wind calmed his nerves, soothing him into a light doze. He leaned back against the rough bark and sighed wearily, just wishing he could disappear into the wood and be done with this all. He was over being looked after all the time.

_**NOOOO!**_

The scream shook him awake. He jerked, hands clutching the bark as he tumbled to his knees and glanced around swiftly.

Nothing. There was nothing. The kids were laughing, the Sisters holding the ends of jump ropes and pushing them on the tire swings. Everything was as it should be. But that wasn't a dream. He hadn't imagined the terror in that sharp cry, the desperation and panic. Something moved on the peripheral of his vision as he turned quickly: a shadow behind the kitchen window. It could be the watcher or it could be Yue the head cook; he wasn't sure, but he was going to find out.

He took the stairs up the back walk two at a time, his legs straining to reach the next one as he sucked in ragged breaths through his nose and out his mouth. He wasn't the best at sports, but he wasn't some tubby little kid either. Mainly he had never felt the need to over exert himself for anyone but himself. Slamming open the kitchen door he stumbled, doubling over with one hand on his knee he wheezed, sweat dripping into his eyes and speckling the terracotta floor tiles with their wetness.

Yue glanced up from her baking rack.

"Genjo! You should know better than to run around inside!"

He brushed off her rebuke with a sneer, "Where is he?" he demanded, finally getting his air back.

"Who?" the older nun looked confused for a moment. Straightening up, she wiped the back of her hand across her forehead leaving a pale smear of flour across the hood of her habit.

"The boy by the window! There was someone there just now, wasn't there?"

"Boy? Oh, you mean Goku? I don't think I've seen him today actually. Why, what's he done now?"

"'Now'?"

She sighed exasperated as she reached for a knife from the countertop and a loaf of cooled bread. "That boy, he just sits there most days, quiet as can be and then bam, before you know it there's a broken vase or a fist sized hole in the wall six feet in the air." She shook her head in bewilderment. "At this rate it's no wonder he keeps getting moved around between homes. Just last week Sister Lin found him sleeping in the sakura tree. He'd been there for a week straight and hadn't even bathed! How does one get to be his age and not know that's asking to get sick?"

He sat down at the kitchen's work table and tore little chunks of bread off the buttered slice she handed him thinking. "Why did he do that?"

"Who knows, he won't talk to anyone. I don't think I've ever heard him speaking now that I think about it."

"How do you know his name then?"

The Sister blinked a couple of times in thoughtful concentration, her brows furrowing slightly, "You know, I don't know. Mother Superior must have said it when she brought him here."

He gaped at that piece of information. He'd only met the imposing woman once, as she never came out of her office on the top floor, but what he remembered left him trembling; she was one scary old hag when she wanted to be. "Mother Superior did?"

"Yes, now that I think about it one day she just appeared before supper and said 'This is Goku, he needs to eat something.' Then she turned and walked away." She laughed nervously, "I guess that's why he's always in here; it's the only place he knows. I'm not ever sure if he has a room. No, no I'm sure he does. All of you do after all." She waved dismissively at the thought.

Hopping down from the stool he licked his fingers one last time before brushing the remaining crumbs on his shorts. He wasn't sure if this Goku was the one he'd felt staring or not, but he most assuredly was interesting and one thing he hated was being bored.

He walked around the old building for an hour looking for the kid. Thinking back on it, he wasn't really sure what he looked like. He ducked into a corner and crouched down, thinking hard about the last time he'd been in the kitchen where he might have seen him.

Yesterday? No, he'd eaten lunch outside by the koi pond that day. Tuesday? No, no, Sister Angela and the toddlers were making papier-mâché in there that day. Could it have been…? He frowned; it must have been his first day when Sister Carmen, a Haitian nun on loan, had brought him in from the courts. He scrunched up his nose, chin in his palm as he squatted and tried to remember.

There had been something shinny…a bracelet. Yes! He remembered now, a small boy, with shaggy brown hair that hung limply down the center of his back like a tattered cloak. He'd been curled up on a stool by the window, just staring at the sakura tree. His lips moved, but from where he was standing he couldn't hear anything. He kept spinning the bracelet on his wrist, the copper band left red and green welts along the honey skin like a brand. He hadn't seen his eyes, or even much of his face, but he remembered the feel of him, the look of him as he sat there rocking on his tailbone slightly. He looked broken.

A flash of white and beige slipped past his hiding hole. He staggered to his feet, trying to find it again in the sudden crush of children coming in from the playground. There! Long brown hair flowed past a bunch of girls as he stood; vainly fighting to push through the crowd, but it was no use. In a matter of moments he was gone. When he finally got to the front door and stared out into the yard, he couldn't find the boy. Not even in the sakura tree.

He sighed, brushed his long bangs out of his face and stared up into the dappled light.

"Where are you?"

His breath was stolen by a swift breeze tinged with rain. A storm was brewing on the horizon. He kicked at a loose stone and snarled-he hated the rain.

Standing at the back of the chapel for mass was a pain. Personally, he didn't believe in a single all powerful God. A bunch of jerks thinking they were gods? _That_ he could believe in. He sighed as the Sisters finished _Ave Maria_ and glanced around the room, eyes alighting on the edge of the rectory door. There, about waist high were four small, dirty fingers. He bit back an exclamation and watched as first a lock of hair, and then a softly curved ear poked around the corner. They were slowly followed by a sunken cheek and cold golden eyes.

"_Goku_," he whispered, trying to figure out what about the boy drew him so. He wanted to go over there and find out if he'd been watching him, but Sister Carmen was standing just a few paces away and dearly loved her ruler, so he stayed put. He watched as Goku turned his head from side to side, looking for something, someone.

His gaze sifted over him and never paused. He'd thought for sure the boy was looking for him, but there was nothing, no recognition or interest. It was like he was blind, but that couldn't be the case, because he ducked back around the corner when Sister Lin looked over towards the door. He decided then and there that this was the day he finally cornered the brat. He'd slip out from his chore group and head for the kitchens, if he wasn't there, he'd try the sakura tree. One of them had to work.

Getting passed the Sisters wasn't too difficult when you 'accidentally' tripped the loudest crybaby in the group. Madi tripped over the end of the pew and went sprawling, her hymnal and bible clattered to the floor nosily only to be drowned out by her boisterous cries. She hadn't even scrapped her knew, what the heck was she screaming for anyways? But it gave him the perfect opportunity to escape unnoticed.

He tried the kitchens first and when that turned up empty, sought out the orchard. Again nothing. As he spun on his heel and stomped back towards the building he stopped dead in his tracks. There sitting with his feet dangling over the edge of the steeple was the elusive pest. The bell tower was strictly off limits because of some structural damage taken during the last earthquake, but there he was, a little speck of blown and gold against the ivory white tower.

As he watched a tall shadow appeared behind him. Goku looked up at the figure and then climbed to his feet effortlessly, following behind the shadowy form dazedly. At the corner a tile slipped out from under his foot and sent him skidding down the roof's edge. He gasped, rushing forward to help, but the boy flung out a hand, twisted mid-air and landed in a crouch on the other side of the railing like it was nothing. He skidded to a stop as Goku stood slowly, glanced around him, and then proceeded to follow the mysterious figure into the tower. He wasn't sure what to make of it at all.

Shaking his head he went up the walkway and headed for the kitchens. He needed something for the headache that was starting to pulse behind his eyes. Part of him was desperately curious to find out more while another part warned him off with a vengeance. He wasn't sure which one to listen to this time. In the past the voice had always given him warning before something bad happened. One counselor had said it was his conscious speaking to him, and other said he had he was very astute at reading people.

He thought they were both full of crap.

Stalking into the kitchen he made for the bottom most drawer on the right hand side of the pantry. Yue thought she was being clever by hiding the painkillers with their child-proof locks here, but really, only adults ever had problems with the stupid safety lids. To prove his point he caught his nail under the edge of the lid and popped it off easily. Taking one Excedrin out of the container he replaced the pill bottle and rummaged around for a clean cup.

He was filling it with water from the tap when he felt the air change in the room. He glanced over his shoulder and almost dropped the porcelain coffee mug onto the floor. Sitting there against a backdrop of dull, gunmetal grey clouds and pattering rain was the little monkey himself.

He took a moment to pop the pill and swallow as he watched Goku watch the world. No one knew how old he was. For all he knew the kid'd been here forever, just sitting in the corner staring out the window at the sakura trees. Sometimes he saw his lips move soundlessly, like he was talking to himself. Sometimes tears slid down his face silently, sometimes he'd jerk and blink, like he'd woken up from a bad nightmare and wasn't quite sure where he was. He was almost always there, sitting still, silent, like a statue.

It pissed him off.

"Oi. Move over."

Slowly, so slowly, big amber-gold eyes turned and regarded him. There wasn't much recognition in them at first, just a dull lifelessness. He leaned down, cupped the thin cheek with his own small hand and peered into the molten depths searching for something. He wasn't sure what it was, but he knew there was more going on behind those eyes; he just had to break through to him somehow.

"Wake up already," he murmured gruffly, the back of his fingers ghosted over the kid's hollow cheek, "Things are happening out here. There are people who want to meet you, places to go, things to eat. Wake up and start living; you're not dead." He paused for a moment and tried to make his voice as soft as he could so as not to startle the boy. "I'm here, so wake up."

The big eyes blinked slowly, the dullness receding. A small, compact hand reached up and trailed through his shoulder length blonde hair reverently.

"Who are you?" a small voice asked rustily.

He smiled a tight little smile and leaned even closer until his forehead rested against the other's.

"I'm Genjo and you're Goku. You awake now?"

Goku's face twitched-a semblance of a smile. "Yeah," he said softly, "Yeah I am."

"Good, come on, lunch is almost ready."

"Can I...can I come with you?"

He smirked as he hauled the kid up beside him, "Idiot, why else would I have come over here? Come on, if I miss lunch because of you, you're dead."

Goku grinned a real grin at him and clasped the offered hand tightly, "Coming!"

"Such a difference!" Sister Yue exclaimed brightly, reaching out to ruffle his hair. He groaned and swatted at the flour coated surface.

"I'm not a dog you know!" he growled out.

Goku giggled and rocked forward on the balls of his feet, grasping his arm tightly as he peered up at him through newly shorn hair. The messy brown mop was still there, but it was slightly tamed by the newly trimmed back and bangs, although they still fell into his eyes on occasion like now. Without thinking he reached out and brushed them away from bright golden eyes.

"I think it looks good on you, Genjo!" he beamed, chubby hand slipping up to clasp at the loose braid hanging over his shoulder.

"It's a bloody braid, how the heck does it look good on me? I only went along with it because you said you'd lend me your Akira manga, but _this_? I look like a girl." He sneered, color high in his cheeks at the way Goku was just about sparkling at him.

"I think it looks pretty, like the sun." Goku whispered reverently and really, he had no defense against him when he spoke like that.

"I'm just a person, Goku." He sighed, twining their fingers together and heading for the table. He pushed the other into a seat and then went to fetch the juice container from the refrigerator.

He felt drained; the quiet ghostlike kid he'd forced out of his shell from a year ago was nothing but a memory now. Goku bounced along as his running commentary on life from the time he woke up until he finally kicked him out of his bed at night. Even then the monkey only went to the end of the bed to climb up to his own bunk. Stupid Sisters thinking he'd stay out of the trees more often if he roomed with some one.

Not that it did much good. He still found him in the weirdest places: the trees, bell tower, and chapel were his favorite. He'd asked him once, why he went there when he was upset over something. Goku had shaken his head and smiled sadly, then stared at his shoes until he couldn't take it anymore and had sat down beside him on the bed. Goku leaned against him, his body hot and hard as he spoke in stuttering sentences.

"I can't remember…before."

"Before?"

"Before here, before…anywhere. I like those places, they make me feel safe. I keep thinking, if I'm there, maybe I'll remember. But I don't. It hurts so much. I feel like," Goku clawed at his chest until he wrapped his arms around him and held his hands firmly in his own, his breathing rough and pained, "I feel like I'm _dying_ inside. There's this great big hole and I can't fill it up. People help, food helps, but nothing makes it go away." He sobbed brokenly against his chest and all he could do was frown.

It scared him when Goku got like this, when he fell back into his old habits and sat for hours on end just _watching_. He much preferred the crazy over excited, childlike Goku to the frighteningly adult Goku that sometimes showed itself when he went cold. Running his fingers through Goku's hair he pulled him tight against his chest.

"I don't know how to make it go away, but…I'm here-if you ever need anything. Right here, Goku and I'll always be here." Goku looked up at him, confusion and weary hope in his eyes as his voice cracked.

"Promise?"

He swallowed hard, he hated promises, as they never lasted. You couldn't trust people, especially not adults, but Goku wasn't an adult he was…well, he was _Goku_ and that seemed to make it alright. He caught Goku's right hand in his and joined their pinkies together.

"Promise." He whispered and did something he never would have done in public, all because it was Goku sitting beside him.

He smiled.

~fin.


End file.
